Just another first day of school.
New shoes.
New outfits.
New school supplies.
Familiar territory. Done this before...a lot!
What people don't remember is that there are a pair of feet missing from this picture.
Today is supposed to be Nate's 1st day of Kindergarten.
Big day!
HUGE!!!
Unfamiliar territory.
Never done this before!
Today I walked past the Kindergarten classes. I saw the Kindergarten teacher that my other 4 kids had. I remember getting an email from her after Nate was born saying that she couldn't wait until he walked into her class in five years.
It's been five years. She is still there. The class is still there. But he is not. So instead, I watched all of the other kids that he should be growing up with walk proudly into their class this morning...holding their sweet mama's hands. I should be in that class. I should be holding his sweet little hand.
Missing that today. Missing him today. Even more than usual.
****
Today is a hard day for me. If you are reading this blog and feel the need to make a hurtful or judgmental comment I ask you to refrain from doing so. I'm hurting enough already.
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6 comments:
((HUGS)) My heart aches for you.
I walk with you today honey. I had to visit the school today with my foster son. There was Livvys friends all getting off the school buses all but Livvy. It hit me like a knife to my heart.
I hate that you had to write that last paragraph, really hoping people will love upon you not tear you down xxx
I am so sorry. Asher would have started Kindergarten this year. Sucked the breath from my lungs when I realized it. Thinking of you, I wish I had words to make it hurt less. There are none. Thinking of you and sending my love.
Oh mama I'm so sorry :( I did the same thing 2 weeks ago when school started here as kae l should have gone to kindergarten. It hurts and is so sad. Thinking of you and sending so much love and prayers!!
Thinking of you in prayer.
It was supposed to be joshua first day of high school. Watching his sister drive off alone brought tears. Sending you a hug!
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